the cat, the bride and liao mama
watched that on sunday afternoon the hkhk people. i like the cat and liao mama better. the bride seems just like a comedy to me. the moral of the story is kinda a cliche. so yea. btw, its 3 different stories, in case you're wondering if they are the characters or wad.

liao mama talks about the life of a mother, her roles at home, from the child's point of view. it's funny, and sad. it is ultimately a sad story, with some joke here and there. a bit like kong yi ji. i like the humour, i like the story liting told too. it's quite similar to my thinking, similar to how i view my mum. but sometimes at some point of time, you tend to only remember her nagging at you, finding her a nuisance. it's through such moments that remind you of her good. it is just like even though you dun show it, you appreciate wad she does for you. the adults always think that we dunno, or at least they think i dunno, that im ignorant or wadeva. and they'll try to squeeze things that you already know into your head. that's not right, since i already know, they cant squeeze it. they can only refresh my memory. but it's like, I KNOW! stop treating me like an idiot.

the cat is about this couple married for 5 years. and the husband has neglected the wife coz he works day and night. or rather he didnt really neglect but she feels neglected. although its a bit like those typical love stories, they reconciled in the end. but i always like these stories, coz they really happen. right? haha. i just like them.

the bride is just this banana plantation's mistress died. she gave he son a magic chest to look for his happiness. she gave him a list of 4 bachelorettes and he has to present the chest to them. and the last one is his love la. though that person nv appear, coz its confirm when the 1st 3 werent. yea.

after the production, we went suntec pasta mania for dinner, there was me, cg, char, kiat, shunhong, sheila, zhiyuan, roxanne, justin, sining, junyi, gerald and the-usually-MIA arvin. had fun digging up old gossips of kiat and shunhong, suaning gerald by shouting, "HUANG BORONG! CHAO JI ZHU CHI REN!!" haha. so fun. love spending time with them. i'll enjoy even more if there isnt school the next day. rox left aft dinner ):

went to the fountain of fortune after dinner. ger, justin and sining dedicated songs for us! so sweet. they even used shunhong's name to dedicate a song for kiat, with a super long message (a poem). it says: To kiat From shunhong if you are the sun, im the clouds. if you are the moon, im the stars. if you are bus 410, im the wheels. hahaha! damn funny la. and then, the dedication for us, or rather from us according to the msg.. To spore hokkien huay kuan arts & cultural troupe From (all our names, which came out damn long on the laser thingie!!) long live SHHKACT!!!!! haha. damn lame la. but it's so super long that it took up the whole msg thing, which can usually post a few at a run. but it's just ours, that one and only msg running! haha. btw, according to the dj, she said "long life SHHKACT!!!" and she tried pronouncing SHHKACT. i think. haha. hilarious.we should have more night outings like that. and hopefully we can stay till morning. maybe chalet or another camp! haha.

monday, tuesday.. it's wednesday today and its ending soon. oh man. prelim's coming in less than half a month's time. less than 2 weeks! i have zero confidence for my econs. sigh.

gp compre to do! signing off. tatax~

zzz
another week gone! wanted to study out through the night on friday actually. but ya, went cine to meet yuklum they all, then all were going home! made me go there for nuthing la. sorry for just stomping off liddat. i shouldnt have let my temper get the better of me. took train straight back to sengkang and took bus back to amk to look for yuklum. but yuk cant come out!! zzz. but i still spent my night out anyway.

sorry. not like yuklum's gonna read this. but ya..

woke up in the afternoon today. didnt really do much studying coz i was online as usual. and i did quite a lot of sudoku. now im having headache!! zz. maybe its the radiation from the computer. so i better go off! tatax~

it's not easy being green
It's not that easy being green
Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
When I think it could be nicer being red, or yellow, or gold
Or something much more colorful like that

It's not easy being green
It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things
And people tend to pass you over
'Cause you're not standing out
Like flashy sparkles in the water
Or stars in the sky

But green's the color of spring
And green can be cool and friendly-like
And green can be big like an ocean
Or important like a river
Or tall like a tree

When green is all there is to be
It could make you wonder why
But why wonder why wonder
I am green, and it'll do fine
It's beautiful, and I think it's what I want to be

random..
got this from zkai's blog.


INSTRUCTIONS
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn't make sense. NO CHEATING!
4. Tag 10 people to play this game too
5. Bold the questions and answers that swack


How are you feeling today?
Stefanie Sun - The Moment
hmmmm. feel like it's THE moment? haha. not really..

Will you get far in life?
Jay Chou - Yi Lu Xiang Bei
wow.. alright, i'll head north from now on to get far! haha.

How do your friends see you?
Evanescence - Missing
MIA? hmmm. maybe my classmates think so.

Will you get married?
The Muppet Show Theme Song
haha!! i guess so? kermit and miss piggy..

Will you ever have children?
Eason Chen - Ming Nian Jing Ri (cantonese)
oh man.. not so soon la! it's just coincidence.. (:

What is the story of your life?
Hall & Oates - Jingle Bell Rock
jingling away! erm.. haha. maybe it means my life story will be jolly? since its a joyous song. but so far, it's alright, dun seem very fantastic yet.

What was high school like?
Gary Cao - Chen Mo Wan Ju
like a quiet toy? in jc, in class, yea.. ive learnt to keep quiet over the years.

How can you get ahead in life?
Katharine McPhee - Over The Rainbow
so i hafta get over the rainbow first? wad a challenge.. it sounds quite tough leh. how? but i'll conquer it. yea?

What is the best thing about your friends?
Evanescence - My Immortal
they are my immortal!! haha. it's quite true okay! kiat, yuklum AND gang! haha.

What is in store for this weekend?
The Jacksons - Blame It On The Boogie
boogie! doubt so.. my weekends are usually boring. blame it on the boogie that's not here!

What song describes you?
I Believe (Korean)
you mean i trust easily huh? i guess.. i can be very trusting sometimes. and am a believer in my own principles.

How is your life going?
Kermit - It's Not Easy Being Green
life's not easy being green for me. so i shall start wearing red, yellow or gold? haha..
It's not that easy being green
Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
When I think it could be nicer being red, or yellow, or gold
Or something much more colorful like that

Will you have a happy life?
Remioromen - Konayuki (Japanese)
konayuki means powdered snow. snow is beautiful but its powdered. shattered beauty? sigh. doesnt sound very nice..

What do your friends really think of you?
The Darkness - Love Is Only A Feeling
they think that love is only a feeling to me? so they think im an unfeeling person lor? hmmmm. maybe i shud be friendlier?

Do people secretly lust after you?
Stefanie Sun - Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough
ermsh.. infer for yourself. haha!

How can you make yourself happy?
The Pirate - Spongebob Squarepants
by buying more sponge and squarepants!! or watch more spongebob? hahahaha. (laughs like spongebob)


haha, hmmmm.

singaporeans..
did some maths in school. not very productive but better when im at home. maybe i should study in school, alone. not implying anything! i just cant concentrate. zzz.

lalala. wanted to study for a while longer, but yuk and nat and all wanted to leave. so yea. took 72 home. it was quite crowded, and i was on the upper-deck. qicai was in front of me. haha, but that's not the point. there's this guy with a woman and a kid who boarded the bus and they couldnt find any seat. so they came up (i assume). but they couldnt find any either. coz apparently, some ppl put their bags on some empty seats. so the guy went back told the woman and kid to go down and told them the situation.

he said, "singaporeans are like that, so inconsiderate......." and he went on complaining. dotss. actually i was quite angry. i wanted to shout at him, "if you want the seat so badly, go get that person to take away the bags and STOP complaining la!" (but knowing me, i'll bv do that.) typical singaporeans scolding singaporeans typical. how ironic. singaporeans love to complain. just like wad im doing now, complaining about others, but never dare to confront them. furthermore, it's like he's scolding EVERYONE on the bus la! some stereotyping. when he himself is a singaporean (i assume). aiya, it's just plain irritating, the way he speaks. grr. i mean not ALL singaporeans are like that wad, so wad's the big fuss about? i mean everywhere, there'll ppl like that. and of course there'll ppl who like to complain. so STOP complaining (to myself also). bahh!

yep, nuthing much happened today, except that i think pe's sucha waste of time today. YES, ive been doing pe for a few weeks already. andrew chin is just wasting our time by doing all those. zzz. and i think i'll slack or hide somewhere during the aces work out. shhh. X) oh and thankew belbel for the sms. it means so much. tatax~

weird day & more weird dreams
had a damn lousy day. it's not like anything major went wrong. just a feel lousy. damn sian and frustrated but there's no one to talk to. but then again, there's nuthing to talk about. it's just a feeling. just need to vent it somewhere.

had treatment today. after that, i took a long stroll towards far east plaza. took an extra long route there, coz i crossed the wrong road, took the wrong turns. just listening to my shuffle. zzz. and i took a long bus ride home from there. hmmm.

i think i wasted another day. but oh well. i've got no mood to study anyway.

i feel so useless, not being able to help. always. its always others giving my advise, not the other way round. just being there is one thing, being able to help is more. but i cant.. i dun wanna always be the person receiving all these. but i've got nothing to give in return!

i hate liars. but sometimes i myself lie. i lied to myself, i lied to others. i hate myself sometimes. i hate myself when i think so much, making things seem so complicated. this really sucks.

i dunno wad izzit, i cant put it in words, i just dun feel like studying. at least for the time being, i guess. i've been slacking so much. i feel worried for myself. but still i dun feel like studying. i cant concentrate. i need a breather.

anyway, last last night, i had another weird dream about he who shall not be named. i seem to dream quite a lot about him. i wonder why. not something very nice, i guess. anyway, it's like me and this girl (i dunno who, but in my dream, she's from choir) were shopping at night, with a black cat, at some void deck shops, with an NTUC trolley. then later we pushed towards a carpark, and we jumped down to the carpark. and the trolley and cat vanished. slowly, more people gathered there after shopping. and he appeared jumping down also and got stuck in a small hill of dried leaves. he started leading us in some work out after he got out of that pile of leaves. then later tze hui took over. i wonder why she appeared in my dream about him. so weird. haha. and i woke up.

dotss.

oh, shan jing told me she dreamt about me coz i didnt go to school yesterday. how nice. someone actually remembers me and acknowledges my presence. (: one such person is enough. i dunnit the whole world to remember me. neligence, i noe it rather well, i believe. but that doesnt mean i like it.

so long, tatax~

my name!
got this website from zhanny's blog, who got it from saffie's. haha. anyway, here's the result of my name!


These names awaken self-expression and intelligence. They usually only succeed in life if they enter the artistic world as actors, musicians or in fields of endeavour where they are teaching and inspiring an audience. If they end up in routine office jobs, their lives reach a dead end and then the negative side expresses through intolerance, argument and an endless series of complaints (no wonder i hate school). Because of a quick mind and a fluid verbal expression their debating abilities are excellent, provided they learn the difference between debate and argument. They are usually way ahead of anyone else and have a quick retort to the thoughts of others. Sometimes their spontaneity and love of speaking make them poor listeners (nope, not true). In debates they must have the last word and this can create problems in their relationships (okay, quite true..). They love to be in the center of the crowd, the spotlight (nope nope). They have wit, confidence and charm. Their entertaining manner endears them to all people.

When they are involved in acting or speaking, their imaginations work in a profoundly creative way (not so true la). They are natural and easy with all types of people (not very true also). There is a strong love nature at the core of their personality. They must learn to express it wisely or be pulled into situations that can lead them into trouble. They are easily drawn to the opposite sex and delight in their company. Love inspires them and actually serves as the strongest motivation in their lives. Consequently their challenge is to understand the higher and lower aspects of the power of love (i guess). They seem to know a great deal about almost everything and have an opinion for as many things (hmmm, yea). Following up on their thoughts and ideas is not a strong point (so true). This is why they must work in a field that inspires them, otherwise boredom destroys their initiative (that's why! school bores me so much). They are so clever that they could mistakenly believe that knowing about things takes the place of action and accomplishment.

Unless they have discipline their efforts are scattered (yes yes!! sigh, not good thing though). Being such an emotional and clever quality they can be extremely creative when they are directed in a positive way (yaa...), but if the rest of their names are unbalanced this can turn out to be a rather self-indulgent influence. They can bring home the teacher's note to the parents of "Your child does not live up to his potential." (always do) These people know the value and importance of play. Sometimes they could be accused of not taking life seriously enough (always..). Their happy-go-lucky natures keep them young, provided they do not take to alcohol (ohh, really? haha.). Their keen intellect and clear mental perception can bring out an intolerance for those who are mentally slower than themselves (oops, im guilty of that). These names produce a quality that is like walking on the thin edge between extreme creativity and emotional indulgence. They could go either way depending on their early discipline or lack thereof (yea..). Their weakness could be laziness and an inclination toward extremes (how true..). Any tension would affect them in the liver (i'll take note of that).


quite interesting. haha. most part are quite true. in fact, i think the last paragraph is soo true la. haha. though some are not so true. but, ya, quite interesting. haha.


anyway, studied out today! at least i did some econs and maths. it's sooo mentally draining la. feel so tired. maybe im always tired. AH! must be mark's influence. haha. bad influence.. XP im not complaining/blaming anyone! haha.

dun complain that im a boring person.. im may be hyper and appear happy in front of others, but that's not the true me, i feel. all those relationships that i spent talking loudly, laughing away, never last. it's easy to put up a fake smile but it's never easy to show your true feelings.

i wonder how some people can live so happily, always laughing. maybe she's just disguising herself, putting up a strong front like many others. but life would be happier if i could simply laugh my head off the simplest thing (genuinely).

you've gotta learn to laugh -too much rain, Paul McCartney

sucha simple song, that didnt sound at all sad when you first hear it. but it's the lyrics that you need to read deeper into. all these rain. hmmmm.

it's late, and there's school tml! starting of the shortened time table. tatax~ no more rain

angel
Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it ok
There's always one reason
To feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seep from my veins
Let me be empty and weightless
And maybe I'll find some peace tonight

In the arms of the angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here

So tired of the straight line
And everywhere you turn
There's vultures and thieves at your back
And the storm keeps on twisting
You keep on building the lie
That you make up for all that you lack
It don't make no difference
Escaping one last time
It's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh
Oh this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

In the arms of the angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here

You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here


read gwei's blog. hmmm. i didnt noe ppl feel the way i do. maybe they're just hiding it from everyone else. simply not showing it. i remember the other time mark said how people say haha on msn/sms, but they are not really laughing.. one way of hiding their true feelings. i mean if u dun want people to think that u're sad, simply add a haha in the conversation, people will not be able to tell.

ive been listening to some ken hirai's songs just now. mesmerised by his voice, with a tinge of sadness in it.

anyway, im supposed to be studying. and i said i'll go off to study. but ended up staying online. it always happens. and i hate this.. zzz. i'll stop making promises that i'll break. tatax~

study+dinner
school ended early on friday coz tan bee lien was sick. so i left school after completing my chinese assignment. but i left my wallet at home. zzz. went to meet calvin at starbucks next to wheelock place after lunching with hanquan in sch. and we studied. haha. yea, i studied okay. haha. did maths. that's all. wrote down a few ideas for my production also. im still thinking. i hope the others are doing so too.

anyway, met calv at ard 3, studied till 6. then we went borders. found lotsa murakami books on sale leh! buy 2 get 1 free! felt like buying them. but ive got no money. wanted to buy norweigian wood. somehow i trust mrs chng's taste. haha. i wonder why. there's this connection that can't be explained by words. but i felt bad lying to her XP regarding the bridge thingie.

walked ard for quite some time at borders, found some interesting books. or rather a lot of interesting books. haha. but i'll either not have the patience or time to finish it. at least not now. met gillian when we were about to leave.

went to meet zaid at food junction at raffles city. john came a little while after that. then we decided to go delifrance since zaid's treating. because he received his second pay! haha. the chemistry teacher! not my favourite subject, but nvm. the treat's the more important thing. hahaha.

shaw and shuang hui came one after another at delifrance. had our dinner and fun talking about shaw and john's love life. and the self-declared International Stupid Day by shaw and calv. haha. only the 2 of them are celebrating that.

went raffles city for dessert, but there's no seats for us, coz its friday night! so we decided tcc at city link instead. met huaa and hooka(?) there. haha. looks the same, all's well (: tcc was full as well. so we went new york new york. and my brother joined us.

tralala! had nice Ultra RICH hot chocolate. NICE!! though it tasted more like Ultra RICH hot milo. haha. food there isnt exactly cheap, but the point is, the food served doesnt exactly look very appetising. in fact it looks disappointing. just like delifrance! haha. i think other than the hot drinks, the rest looks quite. nvm.. shuang hui's white chocolate looks like milk, mine's milo. zaid's fried banana split is just goreng pisang with ice cream, my brother's oreo shake looks like funfair drinks, shaw's pancake with ice cream is really just pancake with ice cream. haha. and he added sooo much honey it looked worse. i think john's mudpie with ice cream and calv's cuppacino looks best. but the mudpie isnt the most fantastic. haha.

so much for the food and drinks. haha. zaid tried to ask me play badminton and kayak next saturday and not study till sunday! some teacher.. haha. even calv is encouraging me to study. sorry, he always does. haha. oops. trips in december!! two thumbs up! dec or jan (to suit john's schedule), anything. haha.

met wendy and friends outside nyny when we were leaving. happy belated birthday! oops.

anyway, i reached home and played sudoku until 3 or 4am in the morning. wow. haha. just feel like completing that book. maybe it'll help my gp, coz it requires logical thinking. hahaha.

alright, time to study! tatax~

finally..
ahh! ive finally finished kafka on the shore, haha. took sucha long time to finish. i think its more exciting towards the end. though i dun fully understand the whole book, i find certain stuff quite interesting. those metaphoric stuff, those search...... its quite a meaningful book. andi recommended it to mrs chng. so that she can explain the parts i dun understand. haha. all the metaphoric stuff are quite cheem to understand. and i dun like the ending! so vague la.. like its hanging there.

anyway, she recommended the kite runner by khaled hosseini. seems interesting. and norweigian wood by murakami also. hmmm. read when im free.

tralala. went outside choir room to sorta study. actually, i just managed to finish the book and i started vandalising the table. haha. OH! i didnt say anything. j1s had prac in the choir room for carolling. haha. so fun to sit there and joke with them (:

went to watch click with mark after that. we didnt watch the break up! coz it already started. though i was positive that we would still be able to catch the starting coz the advertisement's super long! but ya. nvm.. click was nice, towards the end. or maybe, just the ending is nice. haha, though the front part builds up to the ending. its kinda a sad ending. the 1st ending im talking about. makes you think about life. like murakami's books.

we should learn to appreciate things and people around us, especially family. i guess we dun appreciate our parents and sibling enough. at least im guilty of that. and i bet everyone else at home does. kinda sad. i dun wanna die with regrets. but it's always easier said than done. sometimes, under certain situations, it's quite hard to control your emotions. but it's possible, i guess. hafta work harder on it. hmmmm. yea.

oh well, it's time for bed, to get ready to face the brand new world tomorrow! haha. tatax~

long bus ride
another normal day. but ive sorted out my mind. it's time.. time to study hard!! i kinda agree with jasmine, that i dun easily give in. maybe im forced into it. i dunno and i cant remember. but yea, i'll not give in this time either.

anyway, after treatment, i took a long bus ride home. it lasted for more than an hour. i enjoy such rides. i dunno why. i prefer bus rides to trains. there's more to see and more to think about on a bus. it's nice on a bus, where you can just doze off and wake up just in time to alight at your stop. it's nice to read on a bus, though its bad for the eyes. read as in novels and stuff, not notes. that'll be boring.

yeap! as ive said, time to work hard! signing off, tatax~

oh NO!
im online again. ive been feeling all lousy and down today. just feel damn tired. reached home early and i fell asleep after packing my table for a while. slept from 3.30 to 7.30.. and yes, ive wasted another day. i hate myself. i hate it when i do things like that. i just cant seem to really sit down and do work. i hate it when i concentrate on what i should be doing. i dun wanna fail my prelims, my As. but i cant seem to settle down to do some proper work, despite what people's been saying to me. but just by simply asking me to study isnt gonna help. it's easier said than done. i mean i can be sitting in front of my table, but i may not be studying what.

okay, i dun really understand wad i just typed. but the point is that, I'M NOT STUDYING! sigh. im worried for myself, coz im not doing anything. how how how.. i just wanna slack around and do nuthing.

okay, let's put it this way.. i know i HAVE to study, and i NEED to study. but i dun feel like studying. it's more like a need to study, but a need and a want is different. so yeap, point made.

and i feel bad, when a need is different from my want. i need to get it started. like wad calvin said, getting the engine started is not easy. totally agreed. im having a hard time here.

and yea, ive been thinking about wad he said, that it's alright to bother people and being too hard on myself. but i still dun like the idea of doing so. maybe bottling things up isnt good. but i'll find a way to let it all out. although my ways may not be the best way, it'll help. i guess. sorry, but i still cant let go, i cant break free..

and hah, some random stuff again. as long as i understand.. so long, tatax~

so long..
it was the choir farewell yesterday.. met up with the rest of 'yuklum and gang' to write messages on the little note pad for the j1s. my brother drove me there, coz i was running late. he has to ruin my day by telling me all those stuff. maybe i should just go there late.

anyway, farewell at zkai's was great. videos after lunch! the 1st one was funny, the 2nd one was a lil more touching. thank you everyone. after that was present exchange aka handing over. they purposely made publicity go 1st, coz hq they all thought the horsey was a lousy present. so mean la. always laugh at me without considering how i feel! only yuklum stood by me.. idiots.

oh yea, there's furball! we found out that it's name is darling. haha. so adorable. (:

anyway, thank you everyone for the presents and cards. and of course all those meaningful messages! then they dunked so many ppl, tc, mark, yuk, dj, aloy.. dunno who else went in.

all in all, i wanna thank all the j1s for the farewell (: the videos, the song, the fun, the entertainment. anyway, it is good that the farewell ended on a light note and everyone had fun.

went steam boating with gillian, joel, jk, huiting bimbo (haha), joe, kunlin, sweekiong. gpt joined us later. yuk, geok, szemun, bel, michelle, zhanny.... many people joined us later! but they went elsewhere to eat. and when fireworks started we werent together. not as fun as i thought it would turn out to be. and zhanny! we didnt drink last night! haha. mark and dj came after fireworks ended.

anw, sidetrack a little. fireworks last night isnt as nice as the concert night one. i think 11th aug's was the best! yep.

went home after that. but we just couldnt get on the bus coz every bus was soooo crowded. so we ended up walking to the mrt station. reached home at 12. was all tired and stuff.. if not for the last train, i wouldnt wanna go home yet. XP

and today! i just wasted another day away. sigh. no motivation to do anything. alright, shall sign off now. tatax~

the cat, the bride and liao ma ma
Presented by : Hokkien Huay Kuan Youth Drama Troupe
Directed by : Clara Tan, Regina Foo and Liang Wei Yuan
Written by : Clara Tan, Regina Foo and Liao Li Ting

A cat in search for the perfect gift.
A man on a quest to select his bride.
A woman on a duty that never ends.

A triple bill in 2 ½ languages (English, Chinese and a little French) exploring the simplicity, eccentricity and sacrifices in life.

Show times:
25 & 26 Aug 2006, 8pm
26 & 27 Aug 2006, 3pm

Ticket price:
$18

you can order tickets through me, or visit here for more ticketing info.

i am not involved in this production in any way, just helping to promote. anyway, it looks quite interesting. anyone wanna watch?

chilled..
yea, im fine already. (:

went to watch fireworks with mark last night. its so nice and long. lasted for 15min just as stated, according to some random guy standing nx to us. haha. other than the fact the area was super crowded and hot, it's a beautiful night. (:

there was electrico's peformance after that! or rather very long after that. only managed to catch the ending part. but still its some 3-4 songs. i think. cant really remember. im not their fan or anything. but i think they are really good. especially after listening to redemption that morning. haha. of course, its a completely different level. X)

talking about redemption, aj's national day celebration was kinda lame and boring. though it MAY be better than last year's, it still cant beat cedar's. the school spirit, i suppose, is the main factor.

anyway, it's NATIONAL DAY today!! haha. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE! am watching the ndp now. reminds me of the cedar's participation in 2003. ahh, wad nice memories. SQ!! damn, cant remember his surname. and there's the star formation we made on the national stadium website, as part of the stadium's memory. (:

but i think this year's ndp isnt as nice. maybe its too early to judge. but it's just wad i think. partly because they kept displaying things that are not singpore. like the deyi band, playing the da chang jin's song. isnt it korean? why is it played on singapore's ndp? weird.

bwah! so sianx! there's still work to be done. zzz. but on a brighter note, my friday will end at 12.15 coz tan bee lien will not be in school! yay! so i wouldnt be ponning school, i wouldnt be wasting money getting mc. oops. haha. and i wouldnt need to bring clothes to change for the vic chorale and vocal consort's concert. i wonder if justin's singing. but anyway, i think ive wasted money buying the ticket. and i think many ppl wanna pon the concert (afte they paid..) haha, i dun feel like going! but i dun wanna waste money and if we pon someone will get angry. yuklum! haha.

oops, dinner's turning cold. tatax~

YES YES! go ahead and continue scolding. stop telling me to do stuff when you yourself are not moving an inch! you think your scoldings are very soothing or what? NOT at all. i like to sit in front of the comp and do nuthing. cant i? say whatever you want..

unknown facts
hah, you may not know that i have a bad temper, coz i seldom show it. i practise control in public. but not at home. so yea.. im confessing here. i know its not good and it is just not fair to my mum and all. but sometimes i really cant control myself. and sometimes i really do feel damn pekcek at home. maybe that's because of my history. which i'd prefer not to publish here. afterall everyone has their own problems and past, that affected them in one way or another, and shaped them to what they are today. it may be something good. or bad.. sigh. oh well.

sometimes i'll think that everyone's wearing a mask, hiding their true self. i mean no one will show themselves totally. and i think everyone has built a wall around them. for protection? perhaps. insecurity? i guess. hmmm..

signing off, tatax~

whatever
yes, i have a foul temper. so what? this life just sucks.. thanks to you, maybe? shouldnt i be the one complaining instead? i really hate you sometimes!

just another day
a saturday came and pass just like that. i didnt do anything except sitting in front of the computer, chatting and doing random stuff like tagging ppl's blogs. anyway, considering that i woke up only at 2.30pm, there's little i can do ba. maybe itsjust another lousy excuse from me. anyway, im home alone again. kinda bored.

digressing a lil, im watching the superband finals now. i think j3's rendition of xiao wei is damn nice la!! im melting..

i agree with bel that school is so boring and rah. i feel that school is quite a waste of time (that's an understatement) nowadays. i dread going to school everyday and i have so so much difficulty getting myself out of bed. i just feel like slacking at home. quoting from gerald's blog, "Coming back to school just seems weird after xiamen. Everything seems weird. Everybody seems weirder. School has become a place where education and time have NO MEANING." kinda true. everything feels weird. maybe this is wad aggie's been saying, XWS. haha. xiamen withdrawal syndrome. but erm, its not just the xiamen trip. its CWS.. choir withdrawal syndrome. feeling so sian now that there's no more choir for me. and probably there wouldnt be any for more in the near future.

i miss everything about choir. ):

i cant find any motivation to do anything. the fact that prelims and all are coming is making me worry. this wouldnt do. i'll just fail everything. and probably retake my As as a private, like jiam. sigh.

hmmmm, i think im kinda useless, i noe how to use my blog to rant and complain. quite angry with myself. sometimes i just hate myself.

im digressing again, juz b is performing on the finals! so nice!

and my mum.. sometimes she really does get on my nerves. my brother also. i noe they meant well. but sometimes its too much. your concern is too overwhelming and i cant take it. what's your problem?? or what's mine.. sigh.

sry to all dear readers. most of the stuff dun really make sense in this entry. im just typing wad i feel. so they naturally dun make much sense. coz im quite senseless, i guess..

RAH! signing off. tatax~

dream
i had a weird dream last night. i was at a theatre or something, watching some show or performance with mark. then suddenly i found this lab-like container (you noe those with windows all ard for ppl to observe wad's inside) at the back of the theatre. and somehow hanquan was with me. we went over and found some choir members inside and particularly there's yuklum sitting at a desk, day dreaming away. then lala was floating ard in the container, waving to us. there's condensation on the window, so i wanted to write something. i dunno why, but i was writing: hanquan is crazy.. somehthing liddat. but surprisingly, yuklum and lala didnt understand. the rest of the ppl inside didnt really care about us actually, coz they dunno wad we were doing. and i suppose they dun understand the scribbles on the window. so i tried writing in mirror-image to me, but they still dun understand.. lala and hanquan tried to open the window to talk, then yi-mei popped out of no where and shouted, " don't! the germs will go into the room!" so both me and hanquan can only stare at them helplessly through the glass window. mark was talking to some girls, mostly j3 sops in the theatre, who are probably immuned to the germs.

anyway, other than the fact that hq was acting like an idiot that made me laugh, i think this is quite a scary dream. -shivers- considering the latest news i heard.. i am quite disturbed by it, ive told bel and yuk. and this dream just further prove how disturbed i am, i guess.

hmmmmm, so long. tatax~

moe survey
did the survey during my half an hour break. poor me had so little to eat after that. anyway, the point is not to grumble about the little break time left, but the fact that i realised i dun ebjoy school much anymore. evidence: ive been ponning lessons more often nowadays.

yea ive ponned gp and econs extra sessions yesterday and i ponned chinese today. i feel that these are a total waste of time. but i must confess that i didnt do much at home either, coz ive been slacking these few days. im guilty. but erm, either way it'll be a waste of time i feel. zzz.

anyway, like i was saying, i dun enjoy school and i said that in the survey. that i do not like going to school. i realised school is so boring la. maybe i didnt JUST realise that fact. but the fact that there's no more choir, it's like MORE boring. sigh. though choir has made me tired, physically and mentally, but its enriching. its a part of me is missing now. but then again, given my lazy nature, i dun wanna stay till so late just for choir. but maybe i should start staying back more in school, then i'll get more stuff done, rather than rotting at home and wasting my precious time away.

the clock is ticking and i know. but i just cant bring myself to do anything. sigh. just feel like slacking.. i feel like sleeping everyday leh. sianx. zzz! hmmm, actually nuhting much happened today. in fact, nothing interesting has been happening in my life since choir olympics. ive just been going to school and coming back home after that like a zombie..

oh well, so long, tatax~